Success depends on the support of other people. The only hurdle between you and what you want to be is the support of others. (Example: Salesman depends on people to buy his product, Executive depend on people to carryout his instruction, if they don’t, the company president or owner fire the executive, not the employees. Collage dean depends on professors to carry forward the educational program. Politician depends on voters to elect him.)
Ten simple but tremendously powerful “like people” rules makes US Pres. Lyndon Johnson long before he became president.
- Learn to remember names, Inefficiency at this point may indicate that your interest is not sufficiently outgoing.
- Be a comfortable person so there is no strain in being with you. Be an old-shoe kind of individual.
- Acquire the quality of relaxed easy-going so that things do not ruffle you.
- Don’t be egotistical. Guard against the impression that you know it all.
- Cultivate the quality of being interesting so people will get something of value from their association with you.
- Study to get the ‘scratchy’ element out of your personality, even those of which you may be unconscious.
- Sincerely attempt to heal, on an honest basis, every misunderstanding you may had or now have. Drain off your grievances.
- Practice liking people until you learn to do so genuinely.
- Never miss an opportunity to say a word of congratulation upon anyone’s achievement, or express sympathy in sorrow or disappointment.
- Give spiritual strength to people, and they will give genuine affection to you.
Take the initiative in building friendship.- Leaders always do. It’s easy and natural for us to tell ourselves, “Let him make the first move”, “Let them call us”, Let her speak first” It’s easy too, virtually to ignore other people. The most important person present is the one person most active in introducing himself. Say: “I may not be very important to him, but he’s important to me. That’s why I’ve got to get to know him.”
Six ways to win friends by exercising just a little initiative:
- Introduce yourself to others at every possible opportunity. – a parties, meetings, at work, everywhere.
- Be sure the other person gets your name straight.
- Be sure you can pronounce the other person’s name the way he pronounces it.
- Write down the other person’s name, and be mighty sure you have it spelled correctly, if possible get address and telephone no.
- Drop a personal note or make a phone call to the new friends you feel you want to know better.
- Say pleasant things to strangers. It warms you up and gets you ready for the task ahead.
- Recognize the fact that no person is perfect. Some people are more nearly perfect than others, but no man is absolutely perfect.
- Recognize the fact that the other fellow has a right to be different. You don’t have to approve of what another fellow does. But, you must not dislike him for doing it.
- Don’t be a reformer. You have a right to your own opinion, but sometimes it’s better to keep it yourself.
Key fact: No person is all good and no person is all bad. The perfect person just doesn’t exist.
The person who does the most talking and the person who is the most successful are rarely the same person. The more successful the person, the more he practices conversation generosity, that is, he encourages the other person to talk about himself, his views, his accomplishment, his family, his job, his problems.
Conversation generosity paves the way to greater success in two important ways:
- Conversation generosity wins friends.
- Conversation generosity helps you learn more about people.
The average person would rather talk about himself than anything else in this world.
When things go wrong, just do two things:
- Ask yourself, “What can I do to make myself more deserving on the next opportunity.
- Don’t waste time and energy being discouraged. Don’t berate yourself, Plan to win next time.
Practice courtesy all he time. It makes other people feel better. It makes you feel better too. Don’t blame others when you receive a setback. Remember, how you think when you lose determines how long it will be until you win.